Politics U.S.
Amid Ilhan Omar Controversy, America Quietly Lists Minnesota On Ebay

U.S.—In the midst of a controversy over Ilhan Omar's inflammatory comments regarding Israel, her subsequent non-apologetic apologies, and her immediate return to saying anti-Semitic things, the United States of America has quietly listed the state of Minnesota for auction on eBay.

The starting bid was set at $130 when the auction went live. Canada quickly bid up the price to the low $2,000s, but it was later revealed that it was just Prime Minister Justin Trudeau having a few too many strawberry daiquiris Wednesday evening, and the nation's bids were rescinded. Several extremist anti-Israel groups bid for the territory as well but accidentally spent all their money on anti-Semitic signs and T-shirts, and so were forced to bow out of the bidding.

At publishing time, the U.S. had settled for throwing Minnesota up on OfferUp, asking for "$20 or trade obo."

Breaking: PayPal Now Available

Many of you told us you wouldn't subscribe until we offered PayPal as a payment option. You apparently weren't bluffing, so we finally caved and added PayPal. Now — like the unbeliever faced with God's invisible qualities displayed in nature — you are without excuse.

There is 1 comment on this article.

You must become a premium subscriber or login to view or post comments on this article.