AUTUMN FALLS, AL—During a sideline interview after a sports game today, the sports athlete unveiled his innovative, unique strategy for winning: score more points than the other team.
"What do you attribute to your success out there today?" asked the reporter of the sports.
"We just went out there today, and, you know, tried to score more points than the other team," said the man who plays the sports as he wiped sweat from his brow. "I just went out there and gave 110%, which is more than 100%. If we play the sports better than the other team, then we win the sports game."
"Wow! Incredible!" said the reporter of the sports. "Do you have any other secrets?"
"Yeah, we also tried to stop the other team from scoring points," said the sports-playing man. "If we score points, but they score more points, then they win the game."
"So your strategy is to not only score a lot of points, but also to minimize the number of points scored by the other team?"
"What does 'minimize' mean?"
"Yeah, then that's right."
Gregory Ilinovich loves murdering people with illegal guns - so he's a bit concerned about all these new gun regulations. Luckily, he tends not to follow laws anyway.