WASHINGTON, D.C.—After the Biden Administration announced they had secured $0.16 of barbecue savings for hardworking families, Senator Bernie Sanders wasted no time in proposing legislation to tax those savings.
"There are millionaires and billionaires who also saved sixteen cents, even though they don't need those savings!" said Bernie Sanders to a C-SPAN camera that was turned off. "This is immoral! We live in an immoral country! Why should the rich get to save sixteen cents when the poor are struggling? I am proposing a new tax!"
The new tax will be levied against the rich. All savings they get using coupons or by going to clearance sales will now have to be reported and taxed.
Sanders also clarified that the poor will be taxed too, but it's ok because they'll get better healthcare or something.
"I refuse to live in a country where people can save money on cookouts without paying their fair share to the government, which is the only force powerful enough to solve all our problems," said Sanders.