DOVER, DE—Noting that she encourages her 13-year-old daughter to listen to her music and watch her videos, local woman Rene Stout claimed Monday that Beyoncé is a good role model, in a statement she almost certainly made while confusing Beyoncé with some other recording artist.
“Whenever she comes out with a new album I buy two copies: one for me and one for my daughter Emily. Beyoncé is a great female leader who empowers women,” the apparently confused mother told reporters, adding that it feels good to know of at least one popular singer she can feel good about encouraging her daughter to listen to—a sentiment she undoubtedly reserves for some other pop culture personality but is mistakenly attributing to Beyoncé.
“Queen Bey’s art teaches my girl how to be a real woman in the 21st Century,” said Stout, who did not appear discombobulated or dizzy, but who, it can nevertheless be said, has probably mixed up Beyoncé and another well known celebrity. She then went on to explain that she has read numerous articles online which have informed her opinion on her favorite singer’s positive effect on females, especially impressionable tweens and teens who need strong heroines to emulate.
Asked if she may be confusing Beyoncé with another artist, Stout said no, explaining that she has followed the singer’s entire career since the days when she was the lead singer of Destiny’s Child, through her breakout solo album Dangerously In Love, to her marriage to rapper Jay Z. “Beyoncé—the one who just performed ‘Formation’ during the Super Bowl 50 Halftime Show—she’s a positive, empowering role model for women,” added Stout, continuing to presumably confuse the singer with some other cultural icon.
Breaking: PayPal Now Available
Many of you told us you wouldn't subscribe until we offered PayPal as a payment option. You apparently weren't bluffing, so we finally caved and added PayPal. Now — like the unbeliever faced with God's invisible qualities displayed in nature — you are without excuse.