BINGHAMTON, NY—According to unconfirmed reports coming out of Binghamton Second Baptist, a Bible study group convening on Sunday evenings managed to stay on topic for an entire meeting, not once going off on completely unrelated tangents.
Witnesses claim the group began discussing the third chapter of Philippians shortly after the scheduled start time of 6 p.m., and somehow continued talking about the subject matter for nearly an hour before closing in prayer.
“It’s some kind of a miracle, no doubt,” group leader Charis Barton told reporters. “I could really feel the Spirit moving through that place as everyone stayed focused on the text and resisted the temptation to ask random questions about subject matter that is in no way related to the study topic.”
“Everyone had completely filled out their study guides the week before too,” she added.
The Bible study group reportedly covered a wide range of topics, all reasonably related to the text at hand, and never once veered off onto subjects like politics, obscure theological issues having nothing to do with the book of Philippians, or what the group was going to do for dinner afterward.
“Praise the Lord,” an emotional Barton said.