Politics
Biden Finally Takes A Question From The Press, Calling On New Reporter Mr. Hamala Karris

PHILADELPHIA, PA—At a campaign stop in Pennsylvania, Joe Biden finally took a question from the press, calling on a new reporter, Hamala Karris of CNN.

The Biden campaign has been careful to make sure their candidates don't take any questions from the press, but Biden finally agreed to answer a question from recent CNN hire Hamala Karris.

"Yes, Mr., uh, Karris, is it? The man in the back with the fine-looking, lush head of hair. Go ahead," Biden said.

"Yes, uh, Mr. Biden," Karris, a reporter fresh out of journalism school and working for CNN, said in a gruff, manly voice. "Mr. Biden, many of us are wondering, why are you so amazing -- and, wait, let me finish -- why are you so amazing, and why is Trump so bad?"

Unfortunately, Biden fumbled the answer, managing to use 17 racial slurs, make 37 misogynist comments, and also make absolutely no sense during his 60-second response.

At publishing time, Harris had finally agreed to answer a question from another recent CNN hire, Boe Jiden.

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