NASHVILLE, TN—In a clever bid to increase the volume of pledges in its 60-day-long pledge drive, local Christian radio DJ Lance Madison threatened to play "Good, Good Father" on repeat until the station's goal was met.
Madison locked himself in the sound booth and placed a paperweight on the "repeat" button, vowing not to turn off the extremely repetitive worship song for days on end if he had to.
"Rather than simply guilt you all into donating, suggesting you don't love Jesus if you don't pledge at least $50 per month, we're going to go with a more radical option this time," the DJ said menacingly on the air. "Here goes: 'Good, Good Father,' non-stop, 24/7, all day, every day, until all you sorry sacks of laziness reach for that phone and call in a hefty pledge."
He further stated he was bound by his conscience to perform the act. "It's just who I am. It's who I am. It's who I aaaaaaaaam!"
The DJ also said a favorite tactic of the radio station is constantly peppering the songs with commercials bragging about how the station doesn't have any commercials and encouraging people to donate.
At publishing time, the station had exceeded its goal by over $10 million within just a few hours, prompting the station to return to its regular schedule of only playing "Good, Good Father" every 15 minutes.
Breaking: PayPal Now Available
Many of you told us you wouldn't subscribe until we offered PayPal as a payment option. You apparently weren't bluffing, so we finally caved and added PayPal. Now — like the unbeliever faced with God's invisible qualities displayed in nature — you are without excuse.