WORLD—According to prophecy experts from around the globe, Taco Bell’s recently introduced Naked Chicken Chalupa menu item is a sure sign of impending apocalypse.
The taco-like food item utilizes fried chicken in lieu of a traditional shell.
Citing the entree’s abominable taste and unholy inversion of all that is good about Mexican food, experts claim the item may have been prophesied about in the books of Revelation and Daniel.
“Scholars have been divided on what exactly the abomination of desolation is, but we’re all pretty much in agreement now that it was a reference to this bizarre travesty of fast food,” prophecy guru Hal Lindsey said Monday. “Why on earth would anyone eat this thing, knowing it comes straight from the bowels of hell?”
Other Bible scholars were in complete agreement, calling the limited-time, fried-chicken-shelled specialty chalupa a definite sign that the time of the pouring out of God’s wrath upon the earth is near.
Breaking: PayPal Now Available
Many of you told us you wouldn't subscribe until we offered PayPal as a payment option. You apparently weren't bluffing, so we finally caved and added PayPal. Now — like the unbeliever faced with God's invisible qualities displayed in nature — you are without excuse.