FRANKLIN, TN—Tragedy struck the Hanson household today. The family sat down to eat together this evening as usual.
Sadly, as the family worked together to set the table, put out the food, and dig in, they missed one crucial step: praying for the meal. This caused a demon to descend into the pot of Hamburger Helper in the middle of the table, taking up residence in the beefy noodles, drawing power from the delicious meal.
"YOU FOOLS!" he cried, cackling as he rushed into the pot of meat-filled pasta, casting an eldritch red glow around the dining area. "COME, MY MINIONS!"
The fallen angel then summoned a host of other demons, who possessed the salad, the fruit bowl, and even the cheesy potatoes.
"What have we done?" cried Mr. Hanson as the demons swirled about the room in a devilish dance of death. "Lord, save us from this fate!"
The family was able to exorcise the food by dipping it in Chick-fil-A sauce.
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