RIO RANCHO, NM—Local man Greg Laurence is being called a heroic good shepherd after he demonstrated Christlike love for his waffle fries by leaving the 99 waffle fries he already had to find the one that fell in that gap between the front seat and the center console in his car.
The Chick-fil-A waffle fry had tragically wandered off as Laurence was trying to eat his meal in the car, falling into the crevasse where fries suffer for all eternity.
"I just did what anyone would do," he told reporters later. "If a man owns a hundred waffle fries, and one of them goes plummeting down the crack near his center console, will he not leave the 99 on the dashboard and go look for the one that fell away?"
While the man was very happy with his giant pile of waffle fries to begin with, he was reportedly happier about the one that he found than the 99 that did not wander off.
"I am not willing that any of these little ones should perish," he said. "Well, I mean, except in the sense that I'm going to devour them."
The waffle fry was welcomed back into the fold and baptized in Chick-fil-A sauce.