MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA—A glitch in Google Maps' navigation feature has been instructing thousands of conservative users to drive off a cliff and die, sources confirmed Wednesday.
Google apologized for the inconvenience and says it is looking into the "innocent error."
"For unknown reasons, our Maps app is telling conservative users to drive off the nearest cliff," said a Google rep. "It's really strange. We've not seen anything like this before."
According to Google, the tech company gathers information on everyone who uses their apps. It builds a profile and labels you based on your religion, preferences, entertainment choices, location, race, gender, and political persuasion. Then, if you're a conservative, the Google Maps app will tell you to find a precipice or sheer rock face nearby and just barrel right off it.
At publishing time, Maps programmers had discovered a similar bug that instructed liberal users to ram into the nearest conservative driver's vehicle and run them off the road.
Breaking: Paypal Now Available
Many of you told us you wouldn't subscribe until we offered Paypal as a payment option. You apparently weren't bluffing, so we finally caved and added Paypal. Now — like the unbeliever faced with God's invisible qualities displayed in nature — you are without excuse.