PORTLAND, OR—In a heartwarming moment of self-reflection, local antifa protester Sparky Moonshine suddenly realized the true fascist was inside him all along.
As he lifted a brick to throw at a conservative reporter, the protester suddenly froze and said to himself, "Wait a minute -- all this time I've been searching for fascists out in the real world, when all along, the true fascist has been inside me."
"Maybe the real fascism is just all the antifa friends I've made along the way," he said.
His heart grew three sizes that day as he was comforted by the thought that among billions of people in the world, he had found his soul-fascist inside him.
"Maybe the real joy of fighting fascism isn't breaking windows or burning things with Molotov cocktails -- maybe the real joy of fighting fascism is finding the fascist inside all of us."
Having made peace with his inner fascist, he then threw the brick at the reporter.