CORNWALL—World War 3 was nearly started after G7 attendees referred to Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau using masculine pronouns, misgendering the progressive, inclusive, genderless leader.
"Excuse me -- him?" an indignant Trudeau said after he overheard Putin referring to him using male pronouns. "How dare you! Did you just assume my gender? Wow. I mean, I thought this was the current year!"
Trudeau immediately called for an aide, instructing him to escalate hostilities with the other countries. "Benoit? Summon the Mounties."
Putin quickly summoned his army of muscular Russians drinking vodka riding bears, while French President Emmanuel Macron asked for his aides to bring him another croissant.
Biden would have ordered a drone strike but no one could find him (he was later located miles away wandering around a local falafel restaurant).
Tensions were finally defused as Boris Johnson suggested everyone take a deep breath and play a game of cricket. "I like this Canadian guy -- I'll be on his team."