Politics
Joe Biden Challenges Trump To Water Aerobics Contest

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Presidential candidate Joe Biden has challenged Trump to a water aerobics contest.

The challenge was intended to make Trump look weak and Biden a more macho, intimidating option for Democrats looking for someone with the right stuff to take Trump on in the general election. Biden said if he's put in the general election, he'll face off against Trump in a water aerobics test of strength in various exercises appropriate for the men's advanced age.

"I'll flutter kick circles around that weakling," Biden boasted in an interview. "My instructor at the Y says I'm one of the most promising students in her 'advanced seniors' class. And then I'll finish him off with a half-dozen leg lifts. He won't see what hit him."

"I'll arm curl him all the way back into the sauna!" he added confidently, attempting to flex but getting a muscle cramp. Luckily the television studio had a mobile scooter and they were able to get him off the studio floor.

Biden also bragged that he uses the "heavy" weights, referring to the half-pound foam dumbbells he uses in the pool.

At publishing time, Biden was forced to withdraw his challenge after he was banned from the gym for getting a little too close to some of the women in the pool.

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