SPRINGFIELD, MA—Local father James MacPherson informed his son Braxton, 15, and daughter Mariyah, 12, Wednesday how much he enjoys listening to rap artist LaCroix, sources confirmed. “His beats are dope,” MacPherson reportedly announced as the family ate lunch together. “Either of you know when his next hot album might drop?”
Hoping to attract their attention away from their smartphones, MacPherson also described his new-found interest in rappers Andy Minnow and Triple E of the One Hundred and Sixteen Crew. “Those homies are fresh,” he confidently exclaimed, prompting a stifled chuckle from Mariyah and a quizzical glance from Braxton.
Reports confirm Mr. MacPherson then produced a small rectangular object from his pocket. “For some really good Christian rap, lay your ears on this tape and get d-d-down with the DC Talk.” At publishing time, Braxton and Mariyah were seen attempting to wirelessly sync the cassette tape with their iPods.
Breaking: PayPal Now Available
Many of you told us you wouldn't subscribe until we offered PayPal as a payment option. You apparently weren't bluffing, so we finally caved and added PayPal. Now — like the unbeliever faced with God's invisible qualities displayed in nature — you are without excuse.