WOODLAWN, MD—According to a recent survey, seniors across the nation are worried that a new “Medicare-For-All” healthcare plan would force them to share the incredible efficiency and top quality medical care they currently enjoy while Medicare is limited to senior citizens only.
“This Medicare for all business really irks me,” Eleanor Henderson of Hoboken, NJ told sources. “With Medicare, I get high-quality, cost-efficient, problem-free healthcare whenever I want, with no restrictions or rationing at all. Why should I have to share that with some young whippersnappers?”
“I’m perturbed,” said Charles Montgomery of Boca Raton, FL. “I instantly receive everything I ask for through Medicare, with no reimbursement denials or delays in paperwork. And every physician accepts Medicare because they pay doctors so well. No way I want to share this best-kept secret with the rest of the country.”
At publishing time, senior citizens were seen mailing strongly worded letters to their congressional representatives, demanding an explanation for why younger citizens might be given access to their highly efficient, perfectly operated Medicare system.