LOS GATOS, CA—Streaming giant Netflix just released a new update that will allow viewers to watch an entire season of a show all at once: “binge mode.”
In binge mode, a grid of small screens appears on your TV, each playing one of the episodes from the season. Viewers have the option of speeding up the playback as well, opening up the possibility of watching an entire season in under fifteen minutes.
Netflix says this will revolutionize the way we watch TV. “Viewers are ready for a new experience,” said Netflix representative, Anita Chung. “This generation doesn’t have time to watch hours and hours of TV. They have important things to do. Binge mode gets an entire season out of the way in the time it takes to eat some pizza.”
Developers say their next goal is to tackle the issue of phone distraction. “A lot of people accuse a show of being badly written, but evidence suggests many of those people look down at their phones during key moments in the episodes that tie the whole story together. We are working on a special mode where Netflix can sense when a viewer is distracted and all the actors on the screen will stand and wait until they look up again. If the viewer is still confused, they can ask our new voice-activated view-assistant Betsy what they missed, and Betsy will fill them in on any questions they have such as, ‘Wait, why is the bald guy mad now?,’ and, ‘How did the red-haired lady die?’”
The company says that a “Purge Mode” is also in the works for people who watch an entire season of something and wish they never had. “This will be huge for anyone who suffered through Iron Fist. It’ll just wipe all memory of the series from your mind.”