Never Trumpers To Be Granted Special VIP Section Of Gulags

U.S.—Democrats are very thankful for Never Trumpers, brave conservatives who fought against Trump his entire administration. They are so grateful that they are rewarding the leaders of the Never Trump movement with access to a special VIP section of the gulags they are building.

"Thank you so much for helping us defeat Trump -- now, when we haul you off to the gulag, you'll get your own very special section," said Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. "You did it! Hooray!"

The VIP section will include some chairs, the occasional bottle of moonshine made from potatoes, and a small TV screen where the Never Trumpers will be allowed to watch CNN.

"Thanks, Democrats!" said Bill Kristol. "I am glad we defeated Trump together! Now, I have some great ideas for how the country should be ru--OW!" He was interrupted as he got whipped and sent back to the salt mines.

Max Boot says he's grateful for the Democrats for allowing him to stay in the gulags for the next 4-8 years, as he needs time to come up with a new column to write since Trump is out of office. Jennifer Rubin will still be brought on as a guest on various cable news channels, so part of her cell has been converted into a little recording studio just for her.

Libertarians who voted third-party will be given a certificate that their conscience remained intact, a decoration that will look great on their cell wall.

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