Theology
New 'Habitat For Heretics' Charity Builds Giant Mansions For Needy Prosperity Gospel Preachers

U.S.—A new charity called "Habitat for Heretics" aims to build giant mansions for impoverished prosperity gospel preachers.

Drawing on billions of dollars in donations, the efforts of volunteers, and the generosity of local construction firms, Habitat for Heretics builds brand-new multi-million-dollar homes for preachers who go around the world peddling a false gospel for monetary gain. The houses are customized to the needs of the preacher, whether that pastor needs a giant study to work on their false messages every week or a dojo to practice slaying people in the Spirit. Expert construction workers volunteer time, labor, and materials to build custom jet hangars, 24-car garages, and lavish pools and hot tubs for the nation's most impoverished, oppressed charlatans.

"There are dozens of prosperity gospel preachers who only have one or two sprawling mansions," said the foundation's creator, who looked suspiciously like Benny Hinn in a false nose and mustache disguise. "Our organization will provide these poor, needy souls with the giant abode they need to really start living their best life now."

The organization selects preachers based on need, starting with those who only have three mansions and working their way up.

"Take a look at a guy like Kenneth Copeland: he only owns one airport and was forced to buy a jet from Tyler Perry at a discount price," said HFH founder. "If that guy is not in need of compassion and charity from a foundation like ours, I don't know who is."

If you know a prosperity gospel preacher who doesn't even own two mansions, contact Habitat for Heretics and let them know.

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