NEW YORK, NY—In response to rising criticisms of the quality of officiating, the NFL has announced an expansion of instant replay review to include every single play, without exception.
To stave off complaints from owners, coaches, players, and fans, moving forward, after each play, the referees will watch all camera angles of the prior play in slow motion. The new policy is designed to ensure that all penalties are called, the ball is spotted at the right yard marker, and no debates ensue over whether the runner was down or not before fumbling.
In response to questions over the possibility of longer games, NFL VP of Officiating Alberto Riveron explained, "The most important thing is getting the call right. Why are we officiating in real-time, when we can get the call right by utilizing replay review on every single play?"
The NFL Referees Union was also in favor of the move. "Not only will our refs get each and every call right, but they no longer have to sprint upfield alongside world-class athletes. This will undoubtedly improve working conditions and quality of life for our members."
While virtually every play will be called correctly moving forward, NFL officials were non-committal on whether the new policy would solve debates over what constitutes a catch. "Are you kidding me? Not even I really understand that one," Riveron said.
Games are now expected to last over 27 hours.