No Greater Love: Widow Puts Last Toilet Paper Roll In Offering Plate

KIRKLAND, WA—Local widow Ethel McMillan displayed radical love for her fellow man during a church service Thursday night by placing her last roll of toilet paper in the offering plate as it passed.

Parishioners at Breath Of Life Presbyterian Church were astounded by the poor widow’s profound sacrifice. The church, which was holding its final gathering before canceling all services until the Coronavirus is eradicated or Jesus returns, whichever comes first, immediately praised the widow for her extravagant gift.

Pastor Bryce Adams told his congregation, "Truly, I say to you, this poor widow has put in more than all those who are contributing to the offering box. For she, out of her poverty of 2-ply, Walmart-brand bath tissue, has put in everything.”

At publishing time, the church had placed the toilet paper in the supply closet, under maximum security, and began a prayer vigil that God might multiply the roll overnight.

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