ANAHEIM, CA—Calling an impromptu meeting to address the issue, local pastor Mike Peterson was forced to once again ask his worship team to please stop dressing up in full KISS costumes every single Sunday.
"Guys, I appreciate everything you do, but the full KISS garb is kinda inappropriate," the exasperated pastor explained for a third time this past Sunday. "And frankly, I'm not sure if 'Detroit Rock City' is the right way to open up a worship service. I want to rock and roll all night and party every day as much as the next cool, hip pastor, but this is kind of getting out of hand."
The pastor also pointed out that the bassist really needed to stop sticking his tongue out as far as it would possibly go while playing worship songs, explaining how the practice could be perceived as distracting and not contributing to a worshipful environment.
"I thought I'd finally gotten through to them when they stopped bringing Iron Maiden's Eddie mascot out during the offertory song," he told reporters. "But I guess not."
"At least the basslines are sick," he admitted.
The worship team has reportedly agreed to a compromise in which they will cut the KISS costumes but still get to play one song off Megadeth's Rust in Peace every Sunday.
Breaking: PayPal Now Available
Many of you told us you wouldn't subscribe until we offered PayPal as a payment option. You apparently weren't bluffing, so we finally caved and added PayPal. Now — like the unbeliever faced with God's invisible qualities displayed in nature — you are without excuse.