Puberty Blockers Now Available In Infant Formula

U.S.—In response to an unprecedented avalanche of requests from 3 activists on Twitter, baby food manufacturers have finally announced they will be providing hormone-laced infant formula for transgender babies. 

"It's never too early to transition," said gender scientist and part-time drag queen Esmeralda Sparklestar. "This will ensure parents can give their trans child the nutrition they need to start transitioning immediately." 

"What is going on here? We can't do this!" said bigoted Senator Rand Paul, clearly intent on spoiling all the fun with all his phobias. He was quickly kicked off Twitter and Facebook before he could spread any more hate. 

The formula will be offered with either estrogen or testosterone depending on which flavor the babies choose between them and their doctor.

Advocates hope this will be the first step towards the next goal: prenatal hormone injections for fetuses.

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