U.S.—Alright, we admit it. We don't have anything left to report on the elections: no new information, no clever commentary, no biting satirical wit. We simply mentioned the midterm elections in the headline so that you would click on it. We even picked a nifty stock image that made you stop scrolling through your social feeds for a split second so you could see if we had something interesting to say about the elections.
We thought about mentioning something else, like a good Calvinist joke or something about worship leaders, but frankly, you weren't gonna click on either of those, were you? We didn't think so. Nope, you're just devouring information on the midterm elections, so we had to pump something out that would grab your attention.
Yup, that's pretty much the only reason you're even reading this. So, this is kinda awkward... uh, read any good books lately? There are some good ones out there, and they're way less toxic than obsessively refreshing your favorite social network to get more info on the elections that you can't affect anyway. So yeah, maybe go read a book.
Or, as long as you're here, maybe check out a few of our other articles. Or just go back to social media and scour for every scrap of information on the elections like a good participant in our democratic republic. Have a great day, and God bless!
Breaking: PayPal Now Available
Many of you told us you wouldn't subscribe until we offered PayPal as a payment option. You apparently weren't bluffing, so we finally caved and added PayPal. Now — like the unbeliever faced with God's invisible qualities displayed in nature — you are without excuse.