WASHINGTON, D.C.—Threatened by an impeachment inquiry that has gained some steam, President Trump was looking for a way to turn around his poll numbers.
The answer fell into his lap as he tweeted out a Nickelback meme. Nickelback filed a copyright complaint, forcing the video to be taking down and forcing Dems to ally themselves with Nickelback.
This was bad enough for the Dems, but then Trump all but sealed their fate by signing an executive order forcing all Nickelback band members to move back to Canada immediately.
ICE agents raided Chad Kroeger's Los Angeles home and put him on a moose bound for Canada right away. Other band members scattered across the country were also sent back on the backs of moose, marmosets, lemmings, and whatever other weird animals Canada has.
"This is a great day for America," Trump said at the signing of the deportation order. "We can no longer allow Canadian bands like Nickelback to just come across our border and ruin our music."
"This is a nation of laws, after all. The greatest laws, maybe ever---believe me," he added to booming applause and wild cheering.
Even the left was forced to praise Trump on this one, with Democrats all over the country agreeing that this was a "genius move" and that Trump may be "the greatest president of all time."